Sassan Sanei, The Blog of

That one with the red thing

2008-02-24T12:11:00.004-05:00

I decided to let Ryan watch a little TV this morning. Usually we try not to do this too often, but I thought he might enjoy it. Ryan is three and a half years old -- an age where the "and a half" is still relevant. Communicating with young children can be a challenge, because sometimes they don't use the best words for getting their idea across, and that leads to confusion and miscommunication. Come to think of it, it's that way with a lot of adults too.

Sassan: Ryan, would you like to watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse?
Ryan: Want to watch Mickey Mouse!
Sassan: Okay, we'll watch one episode. Which one would you like to see?
Ryan: The one with the rocket ship!
Sassan: Sorry, I don't think we have that one. Let's see what we do have! We have Mickey's Treat, Pluto's Best, Donald the Frog Prince, Daisy in the Sky, Goofy the Great, Minnie's Birthday, Donald's Big Balloon Race, Pluto's Puppy-Sitting Adventure, Sleeping Minnie, Donald and the Beanstalk, Goofy's Bird, Goofy the Home Maker, Mickey Goes Fishing, A Surprise for Minnie, Mickey's Treasure Hunt, and Minnie Red Riding Hood. Which one of those would you like to see?
Ryan: Umm, umm, that one, the one with the red thing.
Sassan: The red thing???
Ryan: The one with the red thing! The one with the red thing!!! That one!
Sassan: What red thing?
Ryan: The red thing! The red thing! Umm, umm, Goofy's Bird.
Sassan: Oh, that red thing!
Ryan: That one! With the red thing!
Sassan: Okay.
Ryan: What Daddy didn't know what Ryan meant for?

No way out

2008-01-16T21:37:00.000-05:00

I'd sure hate to be stuck in this traffic jam! (Click on image for a larger view.)

Sorry I don't have the original source to credit the image.

I'm not sure what to make of this question

2008-01-12T09:30:00.001-05:00

My three-year-old son Ryan just asked me:

How come sometimes Daddy doesn't know everything more than Mommy?

Is that a good thing, or a bad thing? I don't know.

The 10 tastiest foods on this, or any other, planet

2007-12-20T12:43:00.000-05:00

Here is a list of the 10 tastiest foods on Earth and elsewhere. (This is different from my list of 10 favourite foods that I previously posted, because a favourite food isn't necessarily the tastiest food, or vice-versa.)

10. Pepperoni stick
9. Buttered popcorn
8. Orange creamsicle
7. Old El Paso cheese dip
6. KFC
5. Earl Grey tea
4. Blue bubble gum ice cream
3. A&W Cream Soda
2. Nutella
1. Reese's peanut butter cups

Hello Blogosphere. I have NO IDEA what this means. Any suggestions??

2007-12-07T21:36:00.000-05:00

I found this word list in an unsent message in my Drafts folder. No recipient, date, or subject line. I have no idea what it's doing in there; all I know is that I must have written it at some point. I'm going nuts trying to figure it out, and would appreciate any suggestions! Thank you!

Denim
Clorox
Alimony
Mentholatum
Argot
Linoleum
Xerox
Polonius
Masonite
Pandemonium
Steponum
Kryptonite
Latrine

Life after BlackBerry

2007-12-02T17:10:00.000-05:00

I've decided to leave my job at RIM and become a full-time, stay-at-home dad to my two young children, Ryan and Megan.

It's a life-changing decision, and people react predictably to this news. If they have children of their own, they are generally very supportive. They say something along the lines of "You're doing a wonderful thing! They're only this age once, and they grow up so fast. It's great that you can take this time to do it."

On the other hand, those who do not have children of their own invariably ask, "What are you going to do with all your free time?" I forgive them the absurdity of this question, because they clearly have no idea what it's like to be around two very busy little kids all day long. They go non-stop, and they don't take breaks. The concept of free time went out the window a long time ago. But thanks for asking.

Leaving work wasn't easy. I started working at RIM in 1996, before there was even a BlackBerry. As an electrical engineering student, I was intrigued by the idea of wireless data communication, which was still in its infancy. I knew that RIM was on the verge of something big, and I wanted to be part of it. The entire company consisted of about 50 people when I joined. Today, it has grown to more than 7,000 employees, including some of the best and brightest minds in the field. The company measures annual sales in the billions of dollars, and has made BlackBerry a recognizable brand name around the world. By any measure, RIM is a huge success story.

I have had an amazing time at RIM. I truly enjoyed working with the people and technology that make the company great. It was a difficult decision to give that up and spend every day raising my kids, who are too young to understand or appreciate the value of what I am doing for them, and who often behave in a thoroughly unpredictable and irrational manner. It isn't the fun and games some people think it is. There are tantrums and unreasonable requests, and a good night's sleep is a thing of the past. It makes me cranky sometimes. But parenting is all about challenges and sacrifices, and this the life I have chosen for myself.

So now that my parental leave is over, I've left my position indefinitely. Tomorrow morning, and every day after that, instead of throwing my laptop bag over my shoulder and heading into work, I'll be at home, changing poopy diapers and teaching the ABC's. Of course I'll miss going into work. But I also know that if I went, I would be missing something even better.

There is no right answer to this question

2007-10-31T19:20:00.001-04:00

"Are you going to share your Hallowe'en candy with your sister?" our neighbour asked Ryan while trick-or-treating, referring to his 7.5-month-old sister Megan.

Rap lyrics translated

2007-10-28T00:05:00.001-04:00

This is awesome.

Rap lyrics translated

Which Friends character are you?

2007-10-27T22:53:00.000-04:00

Fun little quiz...

Which Friends Character Are You?
	You are Ross. You're intelligent and adored by your parents. However, your lack of social skills causes you to talk too much and try too hard. While your friends pick on you for your nerdiness, they better watch our for your rage.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

To the other people waiting in line with me at the passport office

2007-09-20T10:15:00.000-04:00

To the other people waiting in line with me at the passport office, I would like to share a few things about my three-year-old son Ryan:

1. Telling me to "control your child" as he breaks loose from my grip and runs off assumes, incorrectly, that I am unaware of what has just happened or that I could easily have prevented it. It further suggests that it's any of your business. Wrong again.

2. A nicer word for you to use might have been "precocious."

3. Actually, he's saying "Fun! Fun! Fun!" You did not hear what you think you may have heard.

4. Yes, I do plan to take him onto an airplane; that's usually why one obtains a passport. I am also aware that it is an even more confined space than the passport office. Painfully aware.

5. I too would like to harness half his energy!

6. I know it's not a toy. But it looks like fun. Thank you for your heartfelt concern.

7. He's THREE. I'm tired. Give me a fucking break.

Sassan and Janet Simpson

2007-09-15T16:16:00.000-04:00

This is awesome!

World War II poster

2007-09-02T12:54:00.000-04:00

This is a Canadian poster from World War II -- "Lick them over there! Come on Canada!" Doesn't it make you feel patriotic and proud?

World War II, for those of you who don't remember, was the biggest war since World War I.

Toronto skyline pictures

2007-09-01T20:46:00.000-04:00

I was in Toronto this week and pointed my camera's sights on one of my favourite photography subjects, the downtown Toronto skyline. This is the city I grew up in, and even though I no longer live there, in many ways it still feels like home.

I used Canon's 24 mm shift lens for the first two pictures, and the 70-300 mm diffractive optics lens for the last three. All the pictures, except the fourth one, used the high dynamic range technique that I previously discussed here and here, to have good detail and colour in both the dark and light areas of the image.

You can click on any picture to open a larger view in a new window.

Montreal pictures

2007-09-01T19:41:00.000-04:00

I was in Montreal two weeks ago and took some time for photography. Here are some of my favourites.

The first one is the interior of Place des Arts metro (subway) station. To get a wide view, I used a Canon 24 mm shift lens to take three pictures: one shifted left, one centre, and one shifted right. Then I combined the three pictures into one frame. (It's like doing a spin panorama, except that the camera remained stationary and the lens was shifted instead, which means that there is no perspective shift from one frame to the next.) I also exposed each frame three times: one normally exposed, one underexposed, and one overexposed, then combined the three exposures into one frame; this allowed me to retain detail in both the shadow and highlight areas of the image. So the following picture is made from a total of nine exposures.

The next picture is of the Chalet du Mont Royal. This was a tricky picture to make, because the ceiling was very dimly lit, while the view out the window was bright and sunny. So again, I made three different exposures (one for the shadows, one for the midtones, and for the highlights) and combined them into one. The camera was on a tripod so that the three images line up properly. This was a large, expansive room, and I used a shift lens (shifted up) so bring in more of the interesting ceiling and less of the boring floor. (Why shift? I could have simply tilted the camera upward, but then the vertical lines would not be parallel. See here for more information on perspective correction lenses.)

Outside this chalet is a lookout over the city, called the Belvedere Kondiaronk. This has always been my favourite spot to take pictures of the city. I took two pictures here, one a traditional image and the other with exaggerated perspective that adds a bit of drama.

Back now to where we started, Place des Arts, where the Montreal World Film Festival would begin just a few days later, and also where the Musée d'art contemporain (Museum of Contemporary Art) is exhibiting the works of Bruce Nauman. These pictures were also combined from several different exposures.

You can click on any of the pictures to bring up a larger view in a new window.

Miss South Carolina says Americans need more maps

2007-08-27T23:01:00.000-04:00

This defies comment.

Question: Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can't locate the U.S. on a world map. Why do you think this is?

Answer: I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because some people out there in our nation don't have maps, and I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like, such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S., should help the U.S., or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children.

Patriot Acts: Then and Now

2007-08-10T09:13:00.000-04:00

This brilliant cartoon comes to us from Propaganda Matrix.

A walk in the park

2007-07-27T09:09:00.001-04:00

These pictures are from a walk in the park by my house (Anndale Park) on June 10. Ryan enjoys nature!

(You can click on each image to open a larger view in a new window.)

Amazon coupon codes!

2007-07-27T08:20:00.000-04:00

Here at the world headquarters of Sassan Sanei, The Blog of, we are busily working to save you some hard-earned money. Our loyal blog readers deserve it!

We are proud to announce an exclusive partnership with the good people at Amazon to save you lots of money on your online purchases. Just go to their web site (that's amazon.ca in Canada, amazon.com in the U.S., and amazon.co.uk in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Island and Various Other Places, etc.), buy lots of things, and enter the following coupon codes at checkout.

You can combine codes for even more great savings!

SASSANSANEI - Save 10% on your entire order!
SASSANSANEI1 - Save 20% on your entire order!
SASSANSANEI2 - Save 30% on your entire order!
SASSANSANEI3 - Get free shipping on your entire order!
SASSANSANEI4 - Take $50 off your purchase! (Requires minimum purchase of $50 before discount.)
SASSANSANEI5 - Spend $25 or more and get a free Apple iPod® portable media player!
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SASSANSANEI7 - Spend $100 or more and get your entire order FREE!

Hurry, these coupons expire at 11:59 pm on !

Don't give your phone number when returning an item to the Please Mum store

2007-07-26T10:16:00.000-04:00

Don't give your phone number when returning an item to the Please Mum store. Our number ended up on their marketing telephone list, and we received an automated call (phone spam) where a computer told us about the "grand re-opening" of their store, a promotion that we could not care less about. For a store that sells baby clothes, they should know that parents of babies sleep strange hours (i.e. when we can) and causing a disruption like mass automated phone recordings is a great way to make sure that we never shop there again.

Ham and cheese

2007-07-22T12:46:00.001-04:00

I like buying a footlong ham sub at Subway because it's $5.69 and with tax it comes to $6.49, so when they ask for "six forty-nine" I feel like I've won the lottery.

Sitefeeds, a la cat

2007-07-16T08:23:00.000-04:00

I love this LOL Feeds site that provides "Cat macros for every occasion." It takes headlines from any site that provides a news feed (including my blog) and turns them into captions for pictures of cute kittens.

Here is what mine looks like:

http://lol.ianloic.com/feed/sassansanei.com/atom.xml

Enjoy, and have a caterrific day!

Flower pictures

2007-05-02T13:51:00.000-04:00

These pictures are from Ryan's first trip to the Toronto Zoo, on July 24, 2006. (I'm a little late posting.) Most people take pictures of animals at the zoo. I took a lot of pictures of flowers. I played around heavily with them in Photoshop to achieve various effects, just to have fun. Now that spring is in the air, it's nice to see flowers again. Here are the results... enjoy!

(You can click on any individual image to open a larger view in a new window.)

Nice Hummer

2007-04-08T13:48:00.000-04:00

So some guy you know just bought a Hummer H3, because there is no more profound public declaration of "I don't give a shit about anybody else but myself" than driving around for the sole purpose of destroying everything around you.

How do you properly congratulate them?

"A Hummer, eh. I figured you more as a Dirty Sanchez type of guy. But whatever yanks your crank."

"You got the H3! Wow. So... you couldn't really afford the H2 huh. That's okay. I'm sure things will pick up for you eventually."

"That's the civilian version, right? Not quite the same as a military Humvee now, is it. But I guess you take what you can get. Congratulations!"

"Making up for a lack of something? Haha."

"You bought a Hummer? OMG, that is so 2004."

"What's the mileage like in that thing?"

"What'd that beast set you back? Twenty, twenty-five thou?"

"Wow, nice Jeep!"

Announcing...

2007-03-25T16:08:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the world, Megan Sanei Bingley!

Our baby girl was born on Friday, March 16 at 3:14 pm EDT. She weighed 4020 grams (8 lbs 14 oz) at birth, and she is 52 cm (20.5 in) long.

We had a scary first few days with her in the hospital, as her blood sugar kept dropping low. This required her to receive dextrose through an IV, in steadily decreasing amounts from about 4 hours after birth until she was 5 days old. The good news is that because it was caught quickly, she is doing fine now, and there are no long-term health concerns. It was just really stressful having to keep her there. A big shout out to the wonderful, caring, and supportive nurses at the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) of Grand River Hospital: you made an unexpected and difficult time easier for us to deal with.

Megan's big brother Ryan, age 31 months, is very happy to have her home, and he likes watching her sleep and helping us change her diapers. He also likes to caress her hair and touch her hands, and he is quite gentle with her.

And now, without further ado, the pictures! (You can click on any picture to open a larger image in a new window.)

This is Megan while she was still in Janet's tummy. Janet went into labour the day after this picture was taken, and Megan was born the day after that.

This is one of the first pictures of our baby girl, about an hour after she was born.

This is Megan with Nanny (Janet's mom).

This is Megan at age three days. Check out the coiffe! Now that's a full head of hair.

This is Megan at five days, as we are getting ready to leave the hospital. Going home at last!

This picture was taken a few minutes before we left for home.

Megan is six days old in this picture. She is, well, sleeping like a baby.

Ryan is the proud big brother!

Megan likes to be held by Nanny while she sleeps.

Random advice to married men

2007-03-14T15:30:00.000-04:00

If your very pregnant wife's pants happen to drop down a little below the equator, and you catch a glimpse of bootie, try to resist the urge to make a comment like "Plumber butt!"

Particularly if you don't speak very clearly, and "plumber" comes out sounding like "plump"...

...because you may find it difficult to convince her of what you actually said.